Graveyard Shift

Some people think that working the graveyard shift is a walk in the park. They should walk 8 hours in my shoes...

Working the graveyard shift is difficult, because it is the shift where people are the most drunk. Drunk people checking in. Drunk people checking out. And drunk hobos without reservations trying to get a place to stay for the night.

The worst part is, the people who come late to check in, after they were charged for not showing up for the night. Everytime someone calls asking about our check in time, I let them know it is between 4p.m. and 1.am.

I personally believe this is a large window of time to check in. However, I let people know that if they need to do a late check in (after 1.a.m), they should call the front desk so someone can write a note in their reservation. So why is it that I get people checking in for the 24th on the 25th at 4 a.m.? Don't they need to know they have to check out by 11? It seems pointless. but the worst part is setting up their reservation again after it has been cancelled and charged for not showing up. Now I am not complaining, I have a great job, and it is a lot easier than other jobs, but refunding a payment to a customer who was charged is not the best part of my night.

I am not alone however. I do get some company from Danny, the security who works the night shift here. He is a good man. Although the two of us know, from firsthand experience the consequences of working this shift.

Our sleeping schedules get messed up. Imagine breaking night, in a place where the lights are on and the music is blasting. I like to listen to palladia. They always have an interesting mix of rock, country, pop, and hip hop. Yeah, I said it right, and don't worry, I'm confused too.

But I keep myself busy. We restock the fridge, and make sure everything is ready for the person who is next on the shift. This includes keeping the work area clean, answering emails, and even taking all the pages of people who checked out, out of our files marked "in house" . But I love working at the L. It is an awesome job. I sometimes get upset when my coworkers start to preach to me, but in the end I love meeting new people. Each shift is an 8 hour speed dating special. I don't fall in love, or even hook up with guests, but it is very similar. Even if I did, I know it will never work out because they are all from out of town. This whole long distance thing never works out.

But by meeting new people, I am starting to notice some bizarre trends. I don't want to make any negative comments about any people from any particular country, but I am noticing some trends. Does that make me a racist, if the people who frequent this hostel, from particular regions all have similar traits? Not that they all have a particular trait, but the propensity for specific traits is higher in some populations than in others. Noticing trends does not make me racist. It just makes me more savy, and it better equips me top deal with people. Don't judge me!

What is really sad is when you develop a close relationship with a customer, and then that customer has to leave, or has a problem that I am unable to solve. This must be how the health insurance companies feel. They promise people they would help pay for medical bills, and then when something comes up, they bail. There is one customer in particular... Joel, a coworker, claims she praises me, but I don't believe that is completely true. She is always really nice to me. She is a lot older than me, but we always kid around. She has had some problems with other people who work here, and I always have to convince her to stay. She has never given me any problems when I work my shift, and I don't know what problems she had with other people, but it makes me sad to see her upset. I guess that comes with the territory of friend.

It is also dangerous to get to know the guests to well. Not only because of the conflict of interest it creates, but also because some guests get too comfortable.

But I wont say anything bad about them. So I am going to go now.

Updates All Around!!!

I have not updated my blog in too long. It appears I have let this blog slip from the top of my fingertips.

As an update, I will be the Mad Hatter for Halloween!!! Not the mad hatter from the disney version of alice and wonderland, but an original mad hatter inspired by Tim Burtons work.

If you wish to see the trailer, it is available here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjMkNrX60mA

I do not have the orange hair, but I do have a hat, makeup, yellow contacts, and a pretty bow. Pictures will be posted as soon as I have them available.

I also have been reading many books since I last wrote here. I have read the entire series of the city of ember.
In truth, the first and second books (City of Ember, and People of Sparks) were better than the Prophet on Yonwood, and the Diamond of Darkhold. In all, these books give some insight as to what may be the future of our human civilization, even though they are only childrens books. The Prophet of Yonwood in particular sounds like it could have taken place in todays society, with war, and a constant feeling of dread perpetually being fed into our minds through the mass media.

I have also finished reading the Dangerous World of Butterflies. It is an exceptional book, and I believe it went well with the Orchid Theif. They both are books that look at a natural subject, but the main focus of the books has little to do with nature, and more to do with the people that research the subjects, and deal with them on a daily basis. Butterfly and Orchid smuggling go hand in hand, and I was very interested when the Laufer admitted the similarities of his and Orleans book.

I am still in NYC, and working at the hostel. I made employee of the month, which earned me a new Ipod Nano. It is pretty cool. I use it to watch podcasts such as CNN news, and Countdown with Keith Olbermann. No, I am not a liberal, I am a moderate, but I still watch CNN and MSNBC. The Ipod can also record video, and it has radio. It was amazing when I was learning how to use it. motion sensitive, and a pedometer, are some of the many functions included as well. I hope to continue to do great work, but I am not sure how many more "employee of the month" or quarter, I can get. I would love to receive another gift, and the prestige again, but who wouldn't. Also, I am afraid that it will create some animosity between me and my coworkers.

Tomorrow I will be going to video games live! It is a concert (at the Beacon theatre tomorrow, but they travel worldwide), that plays music from video games. They allow the crowd to record, and I have great seats, so I will see, and most likely have video, of how it all went down!

I am currently reading Will they Trust Us Again by Michael Moore. Since I just started it, I am not sure how good it is yet.

I am still waiting for a book by Richard Dawkins to come. I purchased it on half.com, and it is supposed to arrive before the 26th, but as the date nears, I am worried I will not have the book in my hands by Halloween. If anything I will contact the seller, but I should not have to go through such pains. Also, I can always purchase books from the Strand in NYC, one of my favorite book stores.

I also have been trying to get in contact with some of my friends, but I am not sure I have much to talk about with them. I miss them. I miss Vermont, and I wish I can go back to college.

Maybe one day.

My Life - An Impromptu blog entry

It has been a while since I have written anything in my blog. I guess that is a good thing since it means, at least in theory, that I have been keeping myself busy. In truth all it really means is that I usually work during the day and have no internet at home to do my blogging.

I got a great job working the front desk at L Hostels. If your not from the city, but are looking for a place to stay, I definately recommend staying at a luxory hostel instead of a hotel. Especially in NY.

I am still living in Soundview though. We had found the perfect apartment in a high rise building, but the plans fell through when the owner decided to be a douche and give the apartment to someone else. Unfortunately, there was nothing we can do. We are however still looking for an apartment. There is one that we may move into, even though it is a bit above our price range. It is on the first floor of a private house, which means that there is plenty of space outside to take care of my valuables, but we will have to see if that's where we will end up.

My mother has come to terms with my atheism, at least in the sense that she is not asking me to go to church with her anymore. I went to six flags earlier this month, and I saw my cousin Divine who is also questioning his mother's christian beliefs. He keeps on upsetting her by saying he has converted to the nation of Islam. I congratulated him. Both to me seem absurd, but at least he is trying to think for himself, rather than just taking his parents religion and running for it. Perhaps one day he will see.

Anyway, I have to go. I am at my job waiting for the mail to come in, even though I am not working. I am not sure what I will be doing tonight but I have to work tomorrow at 4 p.m. (Evening shift). Perhaps I will call some friends tonight and try to see a movie or something.

An Intellectual Thinks About Love and Sex With Robots

I just finished reading Love and Sex with Robots by David Levy, and I think the hypotheses it poses are very fresh. He devotes the first three chapters to the book to explaining how (and why) humans love, and then decides to apply those attributes to how (and why) we would love robots. The last four chapters are devoted to why people seek sex, and why we would seek sex with robots. One thing that is left out is the major roadblock to this (sensuous) idea becoming a reality.

CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIANS. They go as far as to deem everything sexual a sin. Premarital sex, homosexual sex, masturbation (solo sex), and even sex with multiple partners are all sin in the eyes of their God. In Texas, it is actually illegal to have a vibrator. It is interesting to note that God, in their eyes, created sex for procreation. This makes me wonder: why does sex feel so good? Was is the devil that has perverted sex from a procreational activity to a reacreational one?

Obviously the reason sex feels good is because we evolved with the need (a basic biological hunger, if you will) to pass on our genes. If sex hurt us, we wouldn’t want to do it. However sex feels good, so we want more of it. Chemicals such as endorphins are released when one has sex (or when one eats chocolate) that gives people the feeling of being in love. However I am sure the christian God will frown about this assessment of sex. On top of listening to everyones prayers, creating beings (such as humans) that destroy everything, and loving everyone, he is also given the job of disapproving of nearly everyones sex lives (including our sex lives with ourselves). But then again, christians are losing their grasp over this great country (I am relieved, I thought we were going to go through another period of time like the Dark Ages, or even worse, the Crusades).

I actually think that sex with robots is a great answer to something that is lacking in our current culture. Sexual education. David Levy goes through great lengths in explaining how robots can train people to be good lovers. I had health education which did have a sexual education segment in school. It consisted of learning about STD’s, condoms and contraception, and the female menstrual cycle. One thing it did not teach was technique. I am sure many people will have a problem with teaching sexual technique in school (I would have loved to have taken such a class for PE in college), citing that it is too vulgar, or obscene. But when you think about it, what is vulgar or obscene about great sex? Shouldn’t it be something we look forward to in our relationships? Something natural within us? What I mean to say is, isn’t it a good thing when a female tells a male “You’re an animal!”

Many people will disagree that such a thing can be regarded as “good”. These people are prudish of course, and probably enjoy sex more than they would ever admit. In this sense they are living a lie. Unless, of course, there is something biologically wrong with them that they cannot feel pleasure, in which case, employing a robot to see what turns them on will help.

Robots can be equipped with the sum of all human knowledge. They can teach the inner workings of the Karma Sutra, or the fine subtleties of cunnilingus, or even the childish nature of foreplay. And they can do this by simulating human-human relationships and interactions. Imagine being able to experiment with a robot as opposed to a human. We as humans shouldn’t feel the need to feel guilty if we did not pleasure our robot, because it is only a robot. We should not feel the need to feel ashamed of what we are doing. There is no one else in the room to see us. And we should NEVER feel the need to force a girlfriend or wife, or other friend to have sex with us, since sex will come in the form of a humanoid robot whenever we need.

I would even go as far as to say that love and sex with robots may be the answer to overpopulation. Christians may have a problem with this. They have a problem with anything that has to do with naked people, and women. Abortion and masturbation are the tip of the iceberg. I could imagine that their response to sex with robots will be that every time a male comes without a female, they are in essence aborting their sperm (never mind that fact that most sperm will never make it to the egg anyway). It is people like them that make the biggest roadblock to love and sex with robots.

If having sex with a life sized human look alike is foreign to you, I ask you to take a look at the Realdoll website (warning nudity, click link). The concept already exists with lifeless dolls, so why not with dolls that move and talk? Dolls that can teach us the finer workings of lovemaking! Dolls that have infinite patience, and that never HAVE to be pleased (although they can probably be programmed to simulate pleasure). These dolls can probably be used to cure sexual dysfunctions, like premature ejaculation, or even help raise the comfort of people who are extremely shy, or submissive during sex.

Imagine a husband turning to his wife, and her saying “Not tonight honey I’m tired”. Or imagine a female turning to her boyfriend, and him saying he’s not ready. Where are these poor souls to turn to? Robots are the answer. They can also help couples who are curious about being swingers, or to individuals who are curious about homosexuality. There is a void in society. A sort of emptiness that is filled with taboo when it comes to sex. How can something so natural come to a point in the 21st century that it is uncomfortable to talk about?

Will Levy’s dream ever come true? Will my dream ever come true?

 My only hope is that I don’t have to fight for the right to have sex with a robot, like multiracial couples had to fight for their right to marry, and like homosexual couples are fighting for their right to marry. Hopefully, after the fight for gay marriage, people will be more open minded to sex as a natural outlet for pleasure (more pleasure than six flags), and stress relief (like watching a movie).

Now that I think about it, I may just have found the reason why I am so irritable lately. More on this to come.

Jonathan Grows Baby Spiders!

When we last left the subject of spider plants, I had put small plantlets into water bottles (with their tops cut off), to root. I have no soil or pots to put them in, so rooting them in water is the ONLY solution I have to keep them alive, and to keep the mother plant nice and clean before my mother intervened, as she tends to often do.

I have been attentively watching over the small plantlets (almost on a daily basis)- adding water to the bottles so they have all the water they need, rotating the bottles so that each plant has enough light (and grows straight, as opposed to towards the window). I have also placed a fan in my room to circulate the dusty, tenement building air. But on this particular occasion I decided to give them each a thorough evaluation. I wanted to see which plantlets had produced roots and which ones were lagging behind in development. I grabbed the small plantlets, and brought them out of their watery environment.

Even from the photo above anyone can see that these plants have grown many roots (however they have not grown as much as the Plectranthus "Mona Lavendar"). But how would I compare all the plants (I have more than 20!)? I decided to lay them all out on the table to do my work. So I emptied out one water bottle and placed all the plantlets on the table.

I think the best part of growing these plants is the rewarding feeling I feel when I see that some of them have actually grown roots (as opposed to just drowning). But now what will I do with these plants? I decided to separate them into two categories, ones that had a lot of root growth (compared to others), and ones that didn't have much (or any). To do this, I had to empty out both water bottles, and I did.

I didn't notice any dust or herbivores on the plants, but I decided to wipe them down anyway, just to give them a fresh look. Afterwords I made two piles of plants, ones with roots that will soon need to be acclimated to life in soil, and ones which needed to remain in water.

I didn't take any formal measurements, but I did observe that the plants that had more roots tended to be bigger. This is what I expected, bigger plants can capture more light, and thus have more energy to root. So separating them was the first step in finding a suitable place to plant them.

I do not currently have a job so if you want a (bare root) spider plant, please let me know. The spider plants I have are fully green (no white streaks), and they have been grown from asexual (stolon) reproduction, not from seed. I am willing to sell them for very cheap! I am only selling to people in NYC, since it is easy to deliver them in the area (thanks to public transportation). Potted spider plants may become available soon if I get a job, or if I find someone to donate small pots and potting soil (if you wish to donate to the Jonathan's World ghetto windowsill garden please contact me).

So where are my spider plants now? Well I placed them on either side of my Nightmare Before Christmas teapot set next to the window. They all seem to be alive and doing well, but I cannot grow them like this forever.